Vera was such a lovely mother in law and an inspiring role model and I am going to really miss her. It feels like we have been grieving her loss for some years now. Dementia is such a cruel disease, and it took her mind away. I always saw her as a woman of faith and prayer who demonstrated genuine love for everyone she met. I don’t remember her getting angry. I knew I could always ask her to pray for something certain that she would do so. She was always willing to go the extra mile in whatever she did. I vividly remember the first time we went to church together after I had got engaged to their son Richard. We had our arms raised in worship and she took my hand and held it. I felt immediately accepted and loved as part of the family. I hadn’t had a very positive experience with my own parents and so it was so amazing to be included in such a warm and loving family. She used to write such lovely words in my birthday cards and for years it used to make me cry. I had to open them when I got home from work so I didn’t go out with a tear stained face. Vera was such a lovely role model for a mother and a grandma. Now that I am a grandma I realise how much I owe her. I know she prayed for her grandchildren, and my daughter Beth often talks about how inspirational she was in her coming to faith. She was always so positive and encouraging about people and was never critical of anyone. She had a lovely mix of spirituality, love and thinking the best of everyone, and yet she had a sense of fun and a mischievous nature. It has been very sad in her later years not to be able to share things with her. When she knew she was becoming forgetful she used to pray she would remember the important things and not let anyone down by not remembering something. We were however still able to pray with her and sing songs, especially “Onward Christian Soldiers” which was a favourite of hers. She sang it with enthusiasm at times in the hospital ward and in the care home. Not sure it was so appreciated in the middle of the night. It was a song she remembered and it represented her deep faith and knowledge that Jesus would be with her. It is a song of determination and victory and I won’t be able to hear it now without thinking of her. I know where she is now and I only hope when I am faced with confusing and frightening times I can call to mind such positive and inspiring words. Pat Cox December 2013